There and back again

I am still here

2007-06-08T02:08:00.000-05:00

I am not lost even though I am not exactly sure to get home from where I am, except by waiting 'til the Army takes me home. As you may have guessed the websense turned back on and blocked me from blog sites again. Well given my new amount of free time I was able to find a place to write to all of you. Thanks for being patient and checking back all the time even the updates are "rare" :) I have been packing and making ready for going home. Now that the packing is over with I have time to get into trouble.
Anyway most of my time lately has been spent helping the Pagan circle on base get established. They are an interesting group to say the least and working with them for this past year has encouraged me in my own faith more than I think they know. I feel like relating with you some of my thoughts that come from working with them.
Initially I was voluntold to help them, but I would have anyway. The 'mayor' chaplain at the time did not want to help them and passed them on to me. I was glad to help them mostly because I really do believe in religious freedom no matter how wrong your religion is (bit of sarcasm there):) also because I have some Pagan friends back home that I would like to better understand, and it is always good to learn new things. In the grand scheme of things I was also thinking that it would be better to help them and remain a positive influence in their lives, rather than shun them and have no influence on them. I truly believe that God brought them across my door for our mutual edification.
They have brought me a far better understanding of the Pagan/Wiccan religion than I had when I came to this place. And from several small teachable moments I have shown them the gospel in action. I believe that it is our place as believers to be a light to the world, but what light are we when we do not let it shine. Avoiding others of a different religion only keeps the light that Christ has given you out of their lives.
As I leave this place I am somewhat alarmed that they are having difficulty finding another chaplain to sponsor them.
What I have learned:
They really really like to worship. They enjoy practicing their religion. It is heartwarming to see people who actually celebrate their religion. It also reinforces the words of Romans 1 to me. That every man knows in his/her heart that God is there. There is an inner unsupressable urge to worship the divine in every heart.
They are dedicated more so than many of my christian brotheren (and sisteren.) Despite ridicule and passive-aggressive persecution they persist in their practices. Really I have to say as far as they go, they really have more faith than I do. For me it is easy to believe in Jesus Christ. It makes so much sense to me the more I learn and understand. What they cling to is a belief that is far more mysterious. I mean for me it is hard sometimes in a hard line scientific world that presses itself against God and belief, but I know that I have facts in my corner. Facts that are bolstered by awesome coincidence. I really don't know what they have. Some of their beliefs are so fantastic I really marvel at their faith.
Plus they have always been very nice and respectful to me. Some of that may be because I am the one who makes their meetings 'legitimate' in army's eyes. But I get the feeling that it is more that that. They respect me for my religious beliefs not in spite of them as so many of my officer peers often do.
All in all I cannot stop my own belief and I hope that in some way they Holy Spirit touches their lives and they come to find Jesus as their savior. I want them to feel the comfort and forgiveness of the God of Israel. Funny thing is that I know that they know that about me and it is alright to them that I believe that they need Jesus. I hope to someday know more about who God is and why our hearts are so quick to make idols (I know my own heart is as such) So quick to put anything and everything in front of worshiping God. I guess one last thing about this group is that they are willing to recognize and name their idols, whereas many Christians who pay Christ lip service are blinded to their own idolatry. I do not know which is worse.

P.S. Scorpians ok Spiders not that great. I happen to like spiders too much to eat them. And hope to see you all face to face real soon.

Take 2

2007-04-27T15:35:00.000-05:00

OK going to try this again. I have started other posts since the last but I have not finished any as you may have noticed. I have realized that I am trying to hard. I wanted to catch up on everything in one post but I think it would be better if I just started with what I did this week.
This week I have been involved with Warrior Transition Training all week. We are preparing the guys to come home. It is a big change we have in store for us. I am totally ready to go home but part of me will kind of miss this place as weird as that sounds. I also found out that there a bunch of things I am angry about. I knew they were there but I guess I chose to ignore them.
We had a class on anger management that I want to run past you. Their basic premise was A + B = C. Event plus belief leads to a certain reaction. One is unable to change the events in their life so that much is what it is. Your belief about that event will then shape your reaction. So for example if event: Guy cuts you off in traffic, you believe it was on purpose, your reaction will be to speed up and tailgate the jerk. She told us that the key to changing your reaction was to change your belief. Maybe the driver was taking his pregnant wife to the hospital or her sick kid. Then your reaction would not be so aggressive.
Here's my problem. As far as the things I am currently angry about; I am finding it impossible to change my belief. My belief that certain things were done intentionally and with malice. Thinking about it only makes me more angry. How do I change my belief. Guess the only way is to confront the individuals I am angry with. Some of the things are that simple. I know that I have to find a way to put my anger behind me. Hope I will find a way.

Ta da

2007-04-06T10:21:00.000-05:00

I'm baaack. The internet trolls finally let me go across the bridge. I haven't posted much lately cause well our websense had filtered out blogs. Now I'm back mwhahahaha.
I am busy preparing for Easter Sunday in a couple of days.
It has really only occurred to me in the last couple of years how hopeless the world was on Good Friday. I went to service yesterday and they did this thing called 'stripping the chapel' After the service we took everything out and put it away. The chapel was left an empty building everything that made it look like a church was taken out.
Without Christ church means nothing. Our calling as pastors and preachers means nothing. So we emptied the church in anticipation of life. Life that comes on Sunday.

News from here

2006-12-14T01:59:00.000-06:00

I sit down to write again and again and nothing seems important enough to write about. so if you don't mind me rambling I will just do that.
One thing I am curious about. So far several people have written to me asking that I do either some writing on their blog, or that I grant them some kind of interview or that in some form or fashion I write something for them about the war here in Iraq. I am never sure if these things are some new brand of scam; and I being suspicious of everything have yet to write them back.
I have never considered myself a scholor or a writer or even good at smashing words together to make a sentence. So for these folks to ask for my input is flattering but at the same time it puts me off a little. I am not fishing for a compliment here, rather just letting you in on the questions that storm through my head. Do they really think I write all that well? Do they really think I have great insights on this war? Do they really want to hear about the gospel applied to a crawl through the mud profession. Actually I would like to hear about that last one.
I started writing on this blog just to keep my family and friends informed and maybe share with them a little of what goes on here. I am glad to hear that others of you are blessed by my comments. I would prefer to just keep this whole thing simple. If you like it great, if you don't, fine. Anything more than that is just not in my plans.
One of my soldiers commented on chapel this week, it was fun to read

he had some interesting insights on chapel this week.

How's Indy?

2006-10-30T22:27:00.000-06:00

Just an update on 'the finger'. I have been hearing reports that many are concerned that I can now only count to nine with my shoes on. Let me squash those rumors right now. I realize that hearing someone has cut their finger on a table saw invokes certain imagry but let me set the record straight. I got a cut about an inch long and a quarter inch deep along the tip of my left index finger. There was no damage to either the bone or the nail bed or the nail for that matter. Tramatic to be sure but nothing missing except my pride and confidence around power tools.
'The finger' who likes to go by Indy thinks the whole situation is quite amusing. He is actually enjoying the attention and all the sympathy cards. I have put him in his place and have sent him right back to work. He got his week of sick leave and now he is back on duty doing all things fingery. In fact he has taken his position next to the crew to help type this update. Though he still a little shy about getting back to the guitar, and he is still holding a grudge against the table saw.
The two had to work together again yesterday, but they got along fine and without incident. The table saw suprisingly had no comment on the incident. I think his exact words were, "shouldn't have been standing so close." Well now that Mr. Sensitive has chimed we will see what this week brings.
Well Indy sends you his thanks for all your concern but don't worry too much about him his stiches come out tomorrow.

Its cold out today

2006-10-24T20:57:00.000-05:00

Woke up shivering today. It seems weird being in this place and being so cold but it reminds me of home. Might have something to do with the roommates setting the AC so low, but it is cold outside as well.

We have entered the rainy season in earnest. It rained a lot last night and that makes the place smell different. A body gets used to a certain amount of dust and bad smell in their lungs and when that is gone; well it is just different. It brings out another smell not unlike when you get a dog wet and they smell entirely different. Or maybe it is because I do not have the dust clogging up my nose every second of the day that my sniffer still works.

Cut my finger on the table saw day before yesterday. Let me tell you it is not all the fun and games people tell you it is. All I can say is that it could have been much worse. I pretty much made hamburger out of the tip of my index finger but nothing more. I was so mad and embarrassed. The medics did a fine job patching me up. I got four stiches and a lot of guff. My pride suffered as much as my finger did. I plan on getting the last laugh and using it for a sermon illustration somehow but nothing yet.

So far it is business as usual. Got my new assistant last week. He is from the Bronx, his name is SFC John Duffy. I just call him Duffy. My last assistant SGT Cowell came down with bad knees and needed a job that was easier on his knees. So far Duffy and I are getting along nicely. I wasn't too excited about the change at first; guess that happens when you get older (not excited about change) but things are turning out better than I expected.

Said goodbye to a couple of good friends this week. SSG Rosenfeld and SPC Gonzales were regular attendees at my chapel services and seriously hardcore prayer warriors. I will miss them both dearly they were an encouragement to me when I really needed it. Several nights we tarried in prayer together praying against the spiritual darkness that blankets this side of the world. They really taught me something about prayer.

We often use prayer as a last resort or as an after thought to our day but not these guys. Prayer is their first option. They are quick to pull the chord on the prayer line if they are having a bad day or just feel like something is up we would get together and pray. I could use more of that kind of belief in my life. I have thanked God every day for them since they first showed up in my service and I am sure that wherever they end up God will use them to do great things.

Grief

2006-09-11T06:07:00.000-05:00

It's been a rough couple of weeks. We had to bury a couple of our own. There is nothing I can say to describe the sorrow.

I searched for something that could begin to express what it feels like to lose someone you love. I found part of a poem written from the perspective of a woman who believes she has lost her husband. Her cries are haunting, and her expression unforgettable.

Song of Solomon tells a story of two people very much in love, a husband and a wife. The wife falls asleep and dreams that her beloved had gone. Her dream had become a nightmare as she realizes he is gone from her and feels her loss.

SS 5:6 I opened to my beloved, but my beloved had turned and gone. My soul failed me when he spoke. I sought him, but found him not; I called him, but he gave no answer.

Her heart had been ripped apart at the prospect of being without the one she loves. And, nothing on this earth could console her while she was apart from him.

All we can think about is summed up in those words of SolomonÂ I opened to my beloved, but my beloved had turned and gone. We opened our eyes on Tuesday and a man we laughed with, a man we fought beside, a man we loved, a man who seemed to bring so much joy and happiness to the table was gone. There are no words that can express the panic, the sense of emptiness and an overall sense that something important was lost forever. And, nothing on this earth could console us now that he was gone.

In the poem I read the wife did not really lose her husband, his absence was only a nightmare. The loss she felt was as real to her as anything in her life. Her heart recognizes the absence of her God. If you look back to the previous verses you see that she had turned him away, and the hurt she felt was because God was no longer to be a comfort to her.

Her peace that came from knowing his presence left with him. Her only hope for quieting her heart and regaining that peace that comes with his presence was to invite his return. The pain she felt served to remind her of the impact His presence made upon her life. Because she hurt she knew that He was important to her.

In the words of Charles Spurgeon, "The happiest condition of a Christian out of heaven is to live in the conscious enjoyment of the presence of the Lord Jesus. When the love of Christ is in the heart by the Holy Spirit, the believer is the most fortunate of all creation. It does not matter what sorrow you endure; the Holy Spirit is able to make the heart live above all surrounding circumstances, so that we can have summer in the midst of winter, and pluck our ripest fruits when there are neither leaves nor fruits upon the tree.

But the Christian is unhappy whenever he loses the sense of the presence of his Lord. Then the pillars of his house are made to tremble; his fresh springs are dried up; the sun is hid from his eyes; and the sky is so dark overhead that he walks, rather wanders, about and nothing can bring him comfort. If he was of the world he could live in the world, but having been taught by grace to look for something better, the loss of that is especially difficult.

I question whether the most of Christians do not sometimes lose the enjoyment of the Lord's company. I question yet further, whether there are not very many professors who live contentedly under that loss; nor can I account for this, except on the supposition that they can have known but little of that presence their best estate. Otherwise, they must be in a most sickly and slumbering condition of soul, gradually becoming worse and worse; or else they never could bear to have things as they are with them.
It seems to me that a real believer in a sound state of health no sooner loses the presence of his Lord than he begins to cry for him. Where has Christ gone? Why have I lost sight of him? The sounds of his footsteps still linger in the ear. The believer wakens and starts, and asks himself, "How is this? Where has my Beloved gone? What is it that has chased him from me? I cannot live if he leave me; therefore, let me speedily seek him, and never rest until once more I am restored to full communion with him." Let me, then, talk a little with such believers as have lost for awhile the comfortable presence of their Lord."

Would you notice if the presence of God departed from your life? How important isthata to you?

100 feet over Baghdad

2006-09-01T09:57:00.000-05:00

I flew into Baghdad yesterday. We came in to town to bring some soldiers around to see some of the green zone. It was early in the morning so I was a little tired as we left. I started to doze off some when I was shaken awake by the sound of flared being fired off of the chopper. I looked out and saw that we were over Baghdad. Many of the buildings were either destroyed or seriously damages. With very few exceptions all the buildings were tan in color. I don't know if they were designed that way or if it was from a lot of dust. Either one would not have surprised me. Overall I was surprised how rundown the city looked.
Anyway we landed in Baghdad and went around and visited some of the Iraqi monuments in the area. Our first stop was the hands of victory and the famous review stand where we see Saddam review his troops and shoot off his AK. The parade stand had been looted and vandalized. Many windows had been broken and graffiti had been sprayed all over. Looks like it once was a nice place. I was impressed by the unique architecture.
We then went to see the hands of victory. Our tour guide told us it was made from items taken from the Iran-Iraq war. He said that swords were forged from the weapons of fallen Iraqi soldiers,and the base of the monument is covered with the helmets of fallen Iranian soldiers. The speed bumps on the road were also made from Iranian helmets. The monument bothered me. I can't imagine how anyone could make a national tribute out of captured war trophies.
From there we went to the tomb of the unknown soldier. It was made in the shape of a falling Iraqi soldiers shield. Under the shield there was a model representing the 7 layers of heaven. Under the monument there was a museum which was empty except for cases where something should be.
Finally we went to eat lunch in one of Saddam's palaces. We ate and looked around the palace. It was the first palace I have ever been in, really nice. We finished up with a swim in Saddam's pool.
We flew out that night and I got another glimpse of Baghdad from 100 feet. I noticed that there is a huge difference between Saddam's part of Baghdad and the part I flew over. I guess many cities are like that, but this disparity seemed so extreme. I realize that there should be something important to say here but I'm all out of things to say.

Just like real life

2006-08-24T23:14:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't blogged in awhile, I am just picking it back up again after my little vacation. There are so many things here that take up my attention. Just like real life, there are too many things to do. I just started running on a regular basis, have I mentioned how much I hate running. Running everyday, well all most, requires I get up early which means I usually get tired early. So getting up early doesn't really add any time to my day. (here you have to run early in the morning, the alternative is too painful to even discuss)

Then there is still the usual stuff like visiting and counseling and that churchy stuff that chaplains like to do. Oh did I mention solitaire, yea I had to ground myself from playing solitaire. It is too hard to get work done otherwise. Then there is people who just want to hang out, and watch movies or play games (I am guessing you do not want to hear about my work activities again they pretty much don't change and the details that do change I cannot say to much about)

I say all this to say, I get pretty busy around here. I just have to slot in time for the things I find important I guess. Anne tells me that a lot of people had been asking about the blog; and I honestly didn't think that many people read it. sniff: I' touched Seriously I will try and write more of what goes on here from day to day. If it is interesting to me I guess it might be interesting to someone else.

recently I got about 20 boxes of stuff from the Coon Rapids American Legion (not to be confused with the VFW [they hate that]) So my assistant and I are in the process of dividing it up into about 15 neat little piles that we can then hand out to the different units in the Squadron. With of course a little 'chaplain tax' of whatever won't make me too fat. Seriously I will be giving most all of it away except for a box of granola bars I couldn't resist.

So here is the first of many thank you's to the Coon Rapids Legion; and to everyone who supports us.

Update

2006-08-21T16:41:00.000-05:00

Just a quick update for everyone. I went home on leave July 4 through the 19th. I got back here a few days later. The travel was exhausting, but worth the trip. I got to see my family and most of my friends. Spent a lot of time in the pool and time playing with Connor. I learned a few things about myself that have changed since I have been here. 1) I like staying home more, which may be a side effect of 2) I don't like to drive as much as I used to. Nothing major just some things I noticed.

The reason why

2006-06-27T00:00:00.000-05:00

I got to go on another convoy last week. We came so close to hitting an IED that I could have reached out of my door and brushed my hand against it. I was not really afraid when it was happening; we were just having a normal conversation and then entered a bit of chaos. After the incident when everyone was relaying their stories is when it hit me that we had come that close to danger.
I was impressed with the high level of competence in our troops. They did everything exactly right for the situation. In the end no one was hurt and the IED was collected for further study. Every mission they go on every day is that dangerous. Sometimes they are not fortunate enough to avoid the IEDs. Sometimes they get hurt, but that doesn't stop them. They know the danger but they go anyway. They go with enthusiasm.
That kind of confidence encourages me to not be afraid, it is contagious. I am sure that everyone there is afraid at some level, but they go anyway. They go out because they are ordered to go, but I believe that they would go out even without orders. It begs the question; "Why?"
Why would someone who has a family and a good and comfortable life volunteer to come over here and purposefully put themselves in the path of danger? I do it because I care about the American soldier. I think that they do it because they are protectors. There are people here that need and want our protection. That need alone is enough to set most of these guys in motion.
These guys are far more noble than me. I risk my life for them, but they do it for people they didn't even know until that day. I do it because I believe that soldiers need God, they do it because someone needs their help. That fact is enough; the fact that there exists ordinary people who are being harassed/oppressed/threatened is reason enough.

Tragedy at the gates

2006-06-17T05:11:00.000-05:00

It was a Friday like any other. Friday is an admin day (the day I work on my sermons and stuff) I was sitting in my office contemplating King Solomon and the Kings of Israel and Judah, when my phone rang.
Me: "Hello, Chaplains office Chaplain Luken speaking."
LT: "Hey Chaplain this is Lt (Soandso) could you come to the gate we have an issue."
me: "what's this all about?"
LT: "well one of our soldiers witnessed something and they are pretty shook up."
Me: "When is shift change?"
LT: "in an hour"
Me: "I'll see you then"
So I quickly ran off to eat lunch, and geared up for going to the gate. The gate is considered hostile territory so we have to wear all of our gear.
I arrived at the gate just as the next shift was gathering to go on. I got a lot of "hey chaplain, haven't seen you here in awhile." or "hey chaplain, remember me?"

After a few short conversations, the LT finds me. He tells me that he wanted me here in case someone wanted to talk. I said, "great thanks for calling me" LT said, "I got your number up on my board, I knew I would be needing it at some point."
As they gathered for their end of shift debrief, I went and talked to the first line leader of another soldier I was worried about.

There was an incident awhile back concerning a soldier belonging to this guy. A genuinely good troop with some bad circumstances (I get that way too much) I asked him how his soldier was doing, and he assured me that they were doing much better. Circumstances were turning in their favor. As I was talking to this NCO, I heard the LT say to the soldiers going off shift that I was here if anyone wanted to talk to me.

At first I didn't think anyone would want to talk. Its kinda uncool to be affected by the realities of war for some reason, and talking to me is like admitting your weak side. One soldier, however, did stay behind. His look was rather sullen, I said hey lets go over here to this room out of the way of the others. I had my assistant let the LT know that we would be able to give him a ride home.

The soldier followed me into the break room. There was no one there thankfully. I was turning to shut the door when the soldier threw his helmet and glasses down on the floor and started to weep uncontrollably. I closed the door and waited. After awhile he gathered himself together so I asked him what happened.

He told me that he was working check point one (that's the checkpoint furthest out) when a local came to the check point with their daughter. He said that he thought at first she was 5 or maybe 6, but she turned out to be 15. He said, "she was so gray chaplain, so gray and unconscious. I was thinking that if I can only get her to the CSH (that's our hospital) Then she will be alright. I knew she didn't have long so I tried to get her in as quickly as possible."

He explained how he gave a quick search and helped get her into the ambulance as quickly as possible. He said, "There was so much yelling, and she was so grey. Her parents kept yelling, yelling like I have never heard before. I cant get their screams out of my head. She was so grey and I knew that if I could just get her to the CSH. Then it happened, she released her bowels and I knew, I just knew it was over. There was nothing I could do."

"She reminded me of my own daughter. I realized that everything I was thinking up until then was so petty. What is important is the safety of my daughter. I don't care what else happens as long as she is alright. Chaplain, why did God have me see something like that? Why did I have to see that little girl die?"

I told him that God needed to show her parents that someone cared about her daughter as much as they did. Someone understood their agony even though he didn't understand their language. They did not grieve alone for their daughter that day, another father grieved with them and still does. He thinks about her and wishes he could have done more, but I believe that he gave more than any parents could have asked for that day.

It turns out that the local hospital turned them away. There is a curfew or operating hours or something like that where you can only come in at certain times. It is just another telling sign of how hard life is here for the locals. In the US something like diabetics is an illness, easily treatable and people live long happy lives despite their condition. I know, I have a good friend my age who has had this condition since we were kids. Here it is a death sentence. Proper medical treatment is not just a matter of filling out the right paperwork.

5 minutes later they just brought her body back to the gate and her parents had to take her home. He was worried about the parents, and how hard it must have been to ride all the way home with their daughter. He said to me that he had visions in their head of these parents driving all the way home with their daughter just to bury her. "They came here as their last hope and we let them down."

I let him know that he did every thing he could have done. That it is OK to be upset. Believe it or not, even in these extreme circumstances, we feel like we should be able to handle these situations. If there is one thing that we do not train our guys for enough it is this. I believe that we were not meant to be OK with death. That is why we attach words like; pain, loss, separation, sorrow, grief, and ask questions like why.

Convoy ops

2006-06-06T22:06:00.000-05:00

This big news this week is that Cowell and I finally went on a convoy. We have been trying to get on one for awhile. Everyone wondered why we would want to go on one, but I had good reasons to go. Basically the guys who do the convoys are tough to visit because I never know where they are. Well this time they were stuck with me for a few hours. It was great to finally visit these guys.

They have several interesting rituals that border on superstition, but for the most part everyone had their job and they worked together to get it all accomplished. Every time before they leave the chute (that's our driveway), they say a prayer over the radio. This time out they let me say the prayer.

15-20 guys at a time. It looks like it will take some doing to get these guys covered. I don't put myself or my assistant in danger for no reason. I think it is important for me to be where these guys are in order to minister to them effectively.

This Sunday I preached from 1 Samuel to a sold out audience. Ok not sold out but the biggest attendance I have had so far, 7! I talked about Saul and a little about his career as King. He started out good, but he finished bad. He didn't have the moxy to trust God for the duration of his Kingship. I encouraged the guys to finish this deployment well. To go home with their heads held high proud of what they have done, rather than ashamed of themselves for losing their moral compass.

Circumstances should not change our morality. What was wrong before crisis, should still be wrong during and after a crisis. We saw a lot of this post 9/11 when everyone wanted a pound of flesh from anyone. Whenever we experience a crisis in our lives like Saul did in 1 Samuel 13, we need to dip into our moral compass and take a look at what we believed to be right pre crisis. Otherwise we may end up doing something that we are ashamed of in the end.

The other problem Saul experienced was his lack of repentance. We see later on in the chapter when Samuel catches Saul in the act, so to speak. And Saul plays it off like he did nothing wrong. His heart remains convinced he was justified by his circumstances. This tendency only gets worse as his kingship tour continues.

The last part of the chapter hints at another. "a man after God's own heart..." one we see toward the end of the book. The next king, King David is a man who is no stranger to sin. In fact on a compare this for that scale, David's sin seems worse. Difference is that David's heart remains open to correction from God. Whenever he sins, and when he does it is often a big one, he repents just as big. God honors his contrite heart. As such David is known as the greatest(short of Christ) king of Israel ever.

Check your heart, is it broken before God? Do you still hear the voice of the Spirit, telling you of God's trail? If you are secure in your own way, and you think that you no longer need God to direct your path, it may be time to turn around. Repent, it does your heart good.

If you don't like the heat stay out of Iraq

2006-06-01T05:00:00.000-05:00

Well I have just lived through my first week of temps averaging in the 1-teens. We live here about 50 meters or so from the Tigris so the humidity is usually around 40% or so. It is literally like that feeling you get when you open the oven on a hot day except everywhere. It makes you wonder why people live here. I mean really come on, I understand the need for cheap property but....

One positive is that no matter weather or not you believe in evolution or in creationism this is probably where we all started out. Kinda convenient I thought. Something that a philosophical science and religion agree upon (kinda) I guess there had to be something.

I have been pretty busy lately with counseling and more counseling. Guess we are getting into the busy time. On Tuesday the phone was literally ringing when I came in at 8 AM, and rang just before I was going to go to bed at 11PM. Long day. I enjoy visiting guys, just don't like leaving my air conditioned office.

Well I am sitting here thinking over last weeks sermon and contemplating next weeks. I thought if I wrote about them it would help me prepare. I have been doing like a whole bible series going from Gen to Rev, trying to weave a common thread of God's grace and his desire for a relationship with us. It seems right to me that since the fall God has been building his relationship with us and revealing himself to us in a special way.

Anyway last Sunday we were talking about the book of Ruth. I found it interesting that Ruth tells Naomi that Boaz is our redeemer. So naturally I had to look up the word redeemer, and it means one who buys back. One who gets back what was lost. In Jewish law it was the responsibility of the oldest male to look out for the family name. This meant that if a family member had to sell their property to pay their debts, or themselves even to pay their debts. The oldest son would then be responsible to take care of the family name and buy back what was lost. Boaz returned life to Naomi and Ruth. They had lost everything when their men had died, but now they could live again new because of what Boaz did for them.

Since I started doing this project of preaching through the bible, it never fails to amaze me how rich scripture is with living examples. What an awesome paradigm to describe Jesus Christ, he is our redeemer. He is the one who buys us back from slavery. Not only that but he is our kinsmen redeemer, he is like our older brother buying us back from the chains of sin's slavery.

This week we start with the Kings. I suppose I should start digging through 1st Samuel. Saul what can you say about Saul. Started strong, finished weak. He always seemed like someone who was prone to rash decisions and immaturity. A bad combo for a king. The people wanted a king.... hmmm. Wanted a king.

That's all for now cya

Rules to live by in the Army

2006-05-20T08:52:00.000-05:00

I just thought this was too funny not to share.

Once upon a time, there was a SPC Schwarz stationed with the Army in the Balkans. SPC Schwarz was either very clever or very bored; but probably both, since he managed to attempt or be warned about 213 things he wasn't allowed to do. He collected those things into a hillarious list and posted them to the web.

1. Not allowed to watch Southpark when I'm supposed to be working.
2. My proper military title is 'Specialist Schwarz' not 'Princess Anastasia'.
3. Not allowed to threaten anyone with black magic.
4. Not allowed to challenge anyone's disbelief of black magic by asking for hair.
5. Not allowed to get silicone breast implants.
6. Not allowed to play 'Pulp Fiction' with a suction-cup dart pistol and any officer.
7. Not allowed to add 'In accordance with the prophesy' to the end of answers I give to a question an officer asks me.
8. Not allowed to add pictures of officers I don't like to War Criminal posters.
9. Not allowed to title any product 'Get Over it'.
10. Not allowed to purchase anyone's soul on Government time.
11. Not allowed to join the communist party.
12. Not allowed to join any militia.
13. Not allowed to form any militia.
14. Not allowed out of my office when the president visited Sarajevo.
15. Not allowed to train adopted stray dogs to 'Sic Brass!'
16. Must get a haircut even if it tampers with my 'Sampson like powers'.
17. God may not contradict any of my orders.
18. May no longer perform my now (in)famous 'Barbie Girl Dance' while on duty.
19. May not call any officers immoral, untrustworthy, lying, slime, even if I'm right.
20. Must not taunt the French any more.
21. Must attempt to not antagonize SAS.
22. Must never call an SAS a 'Wanker'.
23. Must never ask anyone who outranks me if they've been smoking crack.
24. Must not tell any officer that I am smarter than they are, especially if it's true.
25. Never confuse a Dutch soldier for a French one.
26. Never tell a German soldier that 'We kicked your ass in World War 2!'
27. Don't tell Princess Di jokes in front of the paras (British Airborne).
28. Don't take the batteries out of the other soldiers alarm clocks (Even if they do hit snooze about forty times).
29. The Irish MPs are not after 'Me frosted lucky charms'.
30. Not allowed to wake an Non-Commissioned Officer by repeatedly banging on the head with a bag of trash.
31. Not allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of my actions.
32. Not allowed to let sock puppets take command of my post.
33. Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.
34. (Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I *did* bring enough for everybody.
35. Not allowed to sing 'High Speed Dirt' by Megadeth during airborne operations. ('See the earth below/Soon to make a crater/Blue sky, black death, I'm off to meet my maker')
36. Can't have flashbacks to wars I was not in. (The Spanish-American War isn't over).
37. Our medic is called 'Sgt Larwasa', not 'Dr. Feelgood'.
38. Our supply Sgt is 'Sgt Watkins' not 'Sugar Daddy'.
39. Not allowed to ask for the day off due to religious purposes, on the basis that the world is going to end, more than once.
40. I do not have super-powers.
41. 'Keep on Trucking' is *not* a psychological warfare message.
42. Not allowed to attempt to appeal to mankind's baser instincts in recruitment posters.
43. Camouflage body paint is not a uniform.
44. I am not the atheist chaplain.
45. I am not allowed to 'Go to Bragg boulevard and shake daddies little money maker for twenties stuffed into my undies'.
46. I am not authorized to fire officers.
47. I am not a citizen of Texas, and those other, forty-nine, lesser states.
48. Not allowed to trade military equipment for 'magic beans'.
49. Not allowed to sell magic beans during duty hours.
50. Not allowed to quote 'Dr Seuss' on military operations.
51. Not allowed to yell 'Take that Cobra' at the rifle range.
52. Not allowed to quote 'Full Metal Jacket ' at the rifle range.
53. 'Napalm sticks to kids' is *not* a motivational phrase.
54. An order to 'Put Kiwi on my boots' does *not* involve fruit.
55. An order to 'Make my Boots black and shiny' does not involve electrical tape.
56. The proper response to a lawful order is not 'Why?'
57. The following words and phrases may not be used in a cadence- Budding sexuality, necrophilia, I hate everyone in this formation and wish they were dead, sexual lubrication, black earth mother, all Marines are latent homosexuals, Tantric yoga, Gotterdammerung, Korean hooker, Eskimo Nell, we've all got jackboots now, slut puppy, or any references to squid.
58. May not make posters depicting the leadership failings of my chain of command.
59. 'The Giant Space Ants' are not at the top of my chain of command.
60. If one soldier has a 2nd Lt bar on his uniform, and I have an E-4 on mine It means he outranks me. It does not mean 'I have been promoted three more times than you'.
61. It is better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission, no longer applies to Specialist Schwarz.
62. Command decisions do *not* need to be ratified by a 2/3 majority.
63. Inflatable novelties do *not* entitle me to BAQ or Separation pay.
64. There are no evil clowns living under my bed.
65. There is no 'Anti-Mime' campaign in Bosnia.
66. I am not the Psychological Warfare Mascot.
67. I may not line my helmet with tin foil to 'Block out the space mind control lasers'.
68. May not pretend to be a facist stormtrooper, while on duty.
69. I am not authorized to prescribe any form of medication.
70. I must not flaunt my deviances in front of my chain of command.
71. May not wear gimp mask while on duty.
72. No military functions are to be performed 'Skyclad'.
73. Woad is not camouflage makeup.
74. May not conduct psychological experiments on my chain of command.
75. "Teddy Bear, Teddy bear, turn around" is *not* a cadence.
76. The MP checkpoint is not an Imperial Stormtrooper roadblock, so I should not tell them "You don't need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for."
77. I may not call block my chain of command.
78. I am neither the king nor queen of cheese.
79. Not allowed to wear a dress to any army functions.
80. May not bring a drag queen to the battalion formal dance.
81. May not form any press gangs.
82. Must not start any SITREP (Situation Report) with "I recently had an experience I just had to write you about...."
83. Must not use military vehicles to 'Squish' things.
84. Not allowed to make any Psychological Warfare products depicting the infamous Ft. Bragg sniper incident.
85. May not challenge anyone in my chain of command to the 'field of honor'.
86. If the thought of something makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.
87. Must not refer to 1st Sgt as 'Mom'.
88. Must not refer to the Commander as 'Dad'.
89. Inflatable sheep do *not* need to be displayed during a room inspection.
90. I am not authorized to initiate Jihad.
91. When asked to give a few words at a military ceremony 'Romper Bomper Stomper Boo' is probably not appropriate.
92. Nerve gas is not funny.
93. Crucifixes do not ward off officers, and I should not test that.
94. I am not in need of a more suitable host body.
95. 'Redneck Zombies' is not a military training aid.
96. Gozer does not dwell in my refrigerator.
97. The proper response to a chemical weapon attack is not 'Tell my chain of command what I really think about them, and then poke holes in their masks.'
98. A smiley face is not used to mark a minefield.
99. Claymore mines are not filled with yummy candy, and it is wrong to tell new soldiers that they are.
100. I am not allowed to mount a bayonet on a crew-served weapon.
101. Rodents are not entitled to burial with full military honors, even if they are "casualties of war".
102. My commander is not old enough to have fought in the civil war, and I should stop implying that he did.
103. Vodka, green food coloring, and a 'Cool Mint' Listerine® bottle is not a good combination.
104. I am not allowed to bum cigarettes off of anyone under twelve.
105. I may not trade my rifle for any of the following: Cigarettes, booze, sexual favors, Kalishnikovs, Soviet Armored vehicles, small children, or bootleg CD's.
106. Must not mock command decisions in front of the press.
107. Should not taunt members of the press, even if they are really fat, exceptionally stupid, and working for UPI.
108. I am not authorized to change national policy in Eastern Europe.
109. Never, ever, attempt to correct a Green Beret officer about anything.
110. I am not qualified to operate any US, German, Polish, or Russian Armored vehicles.
111. When saluting a 'leg' officer, an appropriate greeting is not "Airborne leads the wa- oh...sorry sir".
112. There is absolutely no need to emulate the people from 'Full Monty' every time I hear the song "Hot Stuff".
113. I cannot trade my CO to the Russians.
114. Crucifying mice - bad idea.
115. Must not use government equipment to bootleg pornography.
116. Burn pits for classified material are not revel fires - therefore it is wrong to dance naked around them.
117. I cannot arrest children for being rude.
118. An EO briefing is probably not the best place to unveil my newest off color joke.
119. I should not use government resources to 'waterproof' dirty magazines.
120. Radioactive material should not be stored in the barracks.
121. I should not teach other soldiers to say offensive and crude things in Albanian, under the guise of teaching them how to say potentially useful phrases.
122. Two drink limit does not mean first and last.
123. Two drink limit does not mean two kinds of drinks.
124. Two drink limit does not mean the drinks can be as large as I like.
125. "No Drinking Of Alcoholic Beverages" does not imply that a Jack Daniel's ® IV is acceptable.
126. "Shpadoinkle" is not a real word.
127. The Microsoft ® "Dancing Paperclip" is not authorized to countermand any orders.
128. "I'm drunk" is a bad answer to any question posed by my commander.
129. No dancing in the turret. This especially applies in conjunction with rule #113.
130. The loudspeaker system is not a forum to voice my ideas.
131. The loudspeaker system is not to be used to replace the radio.
132. The loudspeaker system is not to be used to broadcast the soundtrack to a porno movie.
133. An order to put polish on my boots means the whole boot.
134. Shouting 'Let's do the village! Let's do the whole f**king village!' while out on a mission is bad.
135. Should not show up at the front gate wearing part of a Russian uniform, messily drunk.
136. Even if my commander did it.
137. Must not teach interpreters how to make "MRE" bombs.
138. I am not authorized to sell mineral rights.
139. Not allowed to use a broadsword to disprove 'The Pen is Mightier than the sword'.
140. 'Calvin-Ball' is not authorized PT.
141. I do not need to keep a 'range card' by my window.
142. 'K-Pot, LBE, and a thin coat of Break-free' is not an authorized uniform.
143. I should not drink three quarts of blue food coloring before a urine test.
144. Nor should I drink three quarts of red food coloring, and scream during the same.
145. I should not threaten suicide with pop rocks and Coke ®.
146. Putting red 'Mike and Ike's' ® into a prescription medicine bottle, and then eating them all in a formation is not funny.
147. Must not create new DOD forms, then insist they be filled out.
148. On Sports Day PT, a wedgie is not considered a legal tackle.
149. The proper way to report to my Commander is 'Specialist Schwarz, reporting as ordered, Sir' not 'You can't prove a thing!'
150. The following items do not exist: Keys to the Drop Zone, A box of grid squares, blinker fluid, winter air for tires, canopy lights, or Chem-Light ® batteries.
151. I should not assign new privates to 'guard the flight line'. .
152. Teaching Albanian children to taunt other soldiers is not nice.
153. I will no longer perform 'lap-dances' while in uniform.
154. If I take the uniform off, in the course of the lap-dance, it still counts.
155. The revolution is not now.
156. When detained by MP's, I do not have a right to a strip search.
157. No part of the military uniform is edible.
158. Bodychecking General officers is not a good idea.
159. Past lives have absolutely no effect on the chain of command.
160. Take that hat off.
161. There is no such thing as a were-virgin.
162. I do not get 'that time of month'.
163. No, the pants are not optional.
164. Not allowed to operate a business out of the barracks.
165. Especially not a pornographic movie studio.
166. Not even if they *are* 'especially patriotic films'
167. Not allowed to 'defect' to OPFOR during training missions.
168. On training missions, try not to shoot down the General's helicopter.
169. 'A full magazine and some privacy' is not the way to help a potential suicide.
170. I am not allowed to create new levels of security clearance.
171. Furby ® is not allowed into classified areas. (I swear to the gods, I did not make that up, it's actually DOD policy).
172. We do not 'charge into battle, naked, like the Celts'.
173. Any device that can crawl across the table on medium, does not need to be brought into the office.
174. I am not to refer to a formation as 'the boxy rectangle thingie'.
175. I am not 'A lesbian trapped in a man's body'.
176. On Army documents, my race is not 'Other'.
177. Nor is it 'Secretariat, in the third'.
178. Pok魯n® trainer is not an MOS.
179. There is no FM for 'wall-to-wall counseling'.
180. My chain of command has neither the time, nor the inclination to hear about what I did with six boxes of Fruit Roll-Ups. ®
181. When operating a military vehicle I may *not* attempt something 'I saw in a cartoon'.
182. My name is not a killing word.
183. I am not the Emperor of anything.
184. Must not taunt officers in the throes of nicotine withdrawal, with cigarettes.
185. May not challenge officers to 'Meet me on the field of honor, at dawn'.
186. Do not dare SERE graduates to eat bugs. They will always do it.
187. Must not make s'mores while on guard duty.
188. Our Humvees cannot be assembled into a giant battle-robot.
189. The proper response to a briefing is not 'That's what you think'.
190. The Masons, and Gray Aliens are not in our chain of command.
191. Shouldn't take incriminating photos of my chain of command.
192. Shouldn't use Photoshop ® to create incriminating photos of my chain of command.
193. I am not allowed to give tattoos.
194. I am not allowed to sing 'Henry the VIII I am' until verse 68 ever again.
195. Not allowed to lead a 'Coup' during training missions.
196. I should not confess to crimes that took place before I was born.
197. Must not valiantly push officers onto hand grenades to save the squad.
198. Despite the confusing similarity in the names, the "Safety Dance" and the "Safety Briefing" are never to be combined.
199. 'To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is a bad long term goal to give the re-enlistment NCO.
200. NEVER nail a stuffed bunny to a cross and put it up in front of the Battalion Headquarters sign as an "Easter Desecration."
201. Don't write up false gigs on a HMMWV PMCS. ("Broken clutch pedal", "Number three turbine has frequent flame-outs", "flux capacitor emits loud whine when engaged")
202. Not allowed to get shot.
203. Not allowed to play into the deluded fantasies of the civlians who are "hearing conversations" from the NSA, FBI, CIA and KGB due to the microchip the aliens implanted in their brain.
204. An airsickness bag is to be used for airsickness *only*. (Also not a Skippy-ism...this was the same dinner.)
205. Must not make T-shirts up depciting a pig with the writing "Eat Pork or Die" in Arabic to bring as civilian attire when preparing to deploy to a primarily Muslim country.
206. Don't ask LTC Steele to sign my copy of Blackhawk Down.
207. Must not go on nine deployments in six years that require a security clearance that I don't have, even if the Army tells me repeatedly that I have one and I have no reason to question them.
208. Do not convince NCO's that their razorbumps are the result of microscopic parasites.

Procrastination makes perfect

2006-05-19T06:26:00.000-05:00

Day 41. Wow 10 days since last post. I saw that Bane had 85 posts last month wonder how he thinks of so much stuff.

Well I am sitting here thinking of anything I can do to avoid finishing this week's sermon. I don't know why I do it, but I do find it very annoying. Sometimes I am just easily distracted I guess. OK so much of the time I am easily distracted. On the bright side I did get my office cleaned up and my books have never been more in order.

This week I spent most of my time visiting the troops at work. I am getting better at finding them wherever they work. I even went out on a patrol to see some of the guys I hardly ever see around. I was supposed to go out again today but that got SNAFUed. I have had some of the usual chaplain crisis', Relationship problems, work problems and just people missing home. One guy said that this place was good for him mostly because we are not allowed to drink here.

I have been working on creating a time and a place where people come to just hang out after work, or before work depending upon how you look at it. A few guys come by almost everyday just to pick on the guitar (I know at this point Diff is thinking, "Hey what did the guitar do?".) To which I have been getting better at playing. I hope to play well enough when I get home to have some worship times with friends at my home. At the moment I am somewhat limited on space due to a finite amount of room in my office. Well the problem of limited space will potentially be solved tomorrow. One of the guys is going to build me a porch; it will not be air conditioned, but plenty of more room. It is not always easy to find everyone so I thought one good way to minister to them would be to get them to come to me.

This week also saw a cool landmark. We get mortored here almost everyday. Fortunately a vast number of them are way off course. Well one that was potentially on course got shot down the other day by our air defense guys. Hooray for them. Other good news is that we caught the buggers shooting the thing. So it was like a double play day for our guys.

Well I had better get to finishing this week's sermon. I am currently in Judges. We are taking a trip from Genesis to Revelation. I am not sure if we will make it all the way to Rev yet, but we will see.

Its been awhile since...

2006-05-09T05:58:00.000-05:00

Day 31. I apologize to those who faithfully check back again and again to see if I have posted anything. Ha ha who am I kidding. Anyway, believe me I have started to post a few times over the last couple of weeks but they all sounded lame. This post may be lame, but I just wanted you to know that I was still here. So excuse me if I ramble a little, it is what I have been wanting to do but I haven't given myself the room to so far. Maybe I have been trying to be to serious lately.

For all of you with an AKO account, I have just discovered AKO IM chat. It is nice to be able to chat with the few of you on my list. The internet service I am able to use here blocks all other chat software. Got to maintain some positive control on the information that goes out there. I even had to register this blogsite so that someone can make sure I am not giving away any sensitive information. I am still not clear on what counts exactly, I just steer away from writing anything specific.

Well I am getting into some form of a schedule now. It seems like everyone else is as well. It is certainly a stress reliever to be somewhat familiar with the place where you live. It still seems strange to me to wake up here every morning. Usually I get up from some nice dream land and then remember that I am far from home. I have 2 room mates and one of them usually wakes me up even though he tries to be quiet.

Some days, just like at home, I wake up and have to hurry off to whatever I have planned. Today was no different, woke up late and rushed out the door on to my first appointment. I went to visit the gravel pit today. Interestingly enough it is completely outside of our base. Today was the first time I have been more than a few steps off the base since I arrived here. Anyway at the gravel pit they check truck going in and out filled with gravel, dirt, sand etc...

It doesn't sound like an exciting job, but it is. There is a lot of contact with LNs(Local Nationals) and TCNs (Third Country Nationals) there at the gravel pit. Our guys make sure these guys are who they say they are. The soldiers I talked to were glad to be "out doing something" as opposed to sitting in the base and watching a computer screen or something like that. One interesting thing I noticed is that most of the population is armed with AK-47s. Not all of them are very nice but still its a machine gun. Got to love that huh.

Well I started my bible study last week and it has gone well so far. There has been a lot of good response to the group. We are using a book from one of my Sem teachers Sinclair Ferguson, Lets Study Mark. I like his books because they are easy to understand and that is exactly what I want for these guys. I thought that we would start out with the Gospel seeing as it is the focus of scripture and what more action packed Gospel to start out with than Mark. I have a syllabus and everything, I feel like a real teacher.

I am doing 2 services on Sundays. I started in Genesis back in Camp Shelby and we have made it up to Numbers. I plan on going through each book and building upon a theme of God's relationship with man. We started with Abraham's covenant in Gen 15. I do not really have this whole thing planned out, but I trust that it will work out OK. For services I have a really great worship leader. His name is SPC Walton, he is one of those guys that just loves to play worship. You can see it on his face whenever he plays. I thank God every day that he is here to help me.

I have been working on my guitar playing. I am no Jimi Hendrix but doing well I think. I can already play a couple of songs, and my fingers hurt everyday. It has also had an effect on my typing, my fingers just do not type like they used to cause I can't feel the keys as well. It might be the keyboard to my laptop or a combination of both I don't know.

Lets see what else. I have become addicted to energy drinks. Yes I know they are mostly just sugar and caffeine but I like. I should write a song about them I think. Hmmm that gives me an idea. More later.

Well think I have rambled enough, promise to write sooner next time.

Chaplain Todd

MOPping

2006-04-27T08:54:00.000-05:00

Day 19. I started a post on Monday but it was lame so I axed it. This week I am starting MOPping as one UMT(unit ministry team) member from the BCT(brigade combat team) put it. MOP is ministry of presence. MOP is one of the best things about this position. Basically I bring God to the soldiers. I go to where they are working or doing their soldier stuff and talk to them or help them do whatever they are doing. I find out where the soldiers from my Squadron are and go and visit them.

MOP is an important part of ministry here. It brings me in face to face contact with the soldiers. There is something about the chaplain position that goes way beyond the person in that position. It is more than respect for me, I believe that it is respect for God. When my soldiers see me with them, I believe that they see that God is there with them too. It is hard for me to describe, it is sometimes even hard for me to understand completely. Whenever I visit someone it seems to me like it is just me visiting, but I have begun to recognize that to the soldier, my presence reminds them of God and I believe their relationship with him.

Most of the time I just have normal conversations. Where are you from kind of conversations. Other times conversations go deeper and often turn spiritual. When you go, come ready to answer back on any topic even remotely relating to scripture.

On Tuesday I visited one of my Troops and they were ready for me to get there. When I arrived they were waiting in a shaded area and the Troop commander asked me to share a word with them. I was caught a little off guard, but I shared a small part of Sunday's sermon with them. It was about the Ten commandments and how God uses them to build our relationship with him. Then when shift change came, I got to do it again! It was really cool. Like church on a Tuesday. Then I went to visit the soldiers at whatever station they were working. It was a really good day. I hope for a repeat next week.

My wife and others have been asking for things to pray about. I have been thinking of things to keep in mind.
1. Safety of the soldiers assigned and attached to the 1/167 RSTA Squadron.

2. Families of these soldiers. I have a lot of families so it seems like there is always one issue or another. Mainly it is relationship issues. This long term separation is hard on families in many different ways. Pray for mental peace in spouses struggling with the absence of a loved one. Pray for marital faithfulness. I don't know what it is that causes such a high level of infidelity in military families but it is a serious problem. It is a problem with both soldiers and spouses, there is enough of it to make me angry every single day. If you know a married someone with a soldier here keep this in mind and in your prayers. If there was one avoidable struggle I face here this is it. And pray for the emotional stress that the separation puts on a marriage relationship.

3. Pray for the leadership. Pray for the leadership of this country and for the leadership of this Squadron. Pray for LTC Martian Apprich and CSM Larry Hall. Their strong leadership makes all the difference here and will make a big difference on how we come home. And pray for the other leaders in the squadron. They have a huge job to do and many of them still need to learn a pace for this deployment.

4. There will always be specific requests, but most of them are confidential. I will let you know of ones that are not.

5. For me; my family is my highest concern. Please keep them constantly in your prayers.

Al Groves

2006-04-21T15:38:00.000-05:00

I received bad news today. A friend, mentor and former teacher of mine is struggling with some serious health issues. It is encouraging to see how this awesome man of God deals with his illness, and even more encouraging to see how his wife is there to struggle with him. Just thinking of them makes me miss their faces. Al and Libby I will be praying for you and your family. Thank you for your ministry, thank you for your example. Thank you with your patience for me and thank you for loving me and welcoming us into your home. I don't know what else to say except that my heart is heavy.

P.S. Thanks Reformed chicks for having their link on your site

What do I do?

2006-04-18T13:34:00.000-05:00

Day 11. My wife reports that people like to ask her what I do all day. So this is what I have been doing lately.
A little something called RIP/TOA. The Army has acronyms for everything.
Rest in place/Transfer of Authority.

As a Squadron we are taking over the "job" of the unit which just left. What I have been doing lately is following the chaplain who was here before me around. He showed me where everything is located, he showed me all the "important" sites, and he walked me through some of the things that he did. He also gave me a file of things that were useful to him.

At the moment I am still accelerating into position. I am meeting with people to find out where everyone will be on a day to day basis so I can find people to talk to. I am making contacts with other chaplains that are on the base with me. I am still learning my way around post.

The first thing I learned to find was my headquarters building. Gotta know where that place is located or I miss out on a lot of information. Second thing is a tie between the main chapel on post and the best dining facility. Who am I kidding it was the dining facility hereby known as the DFAC. The DFAC is great, too great for a fat guy like me. I try and resist all the good food there. Mostly I have been living off of grilled cheese sandwiches and applesauce. mmmmmm. I have also learned to like this stuff called rip fuel, it is basically sugar, caffeine and some vitamins thrown in to make it sound like it is good for you. I am not much of a coffee drinker, but one of these babys in the morning is all the breakfast I need. Lastly I am slowly learning to find the different places where the commanders and first sergeants hide. Important to know cause they know where all their troops are.

So a typical day so far (and this will probably change, at least I hope it will) I get up and do the whole shave, shower, brush thing. Go to a meeting, oh wait I forgot drink rip fuel, then go to a meeting. After the meeting I have breakfast if I am hungry and there is time. Next I have appointments set up with people that will help me make a more permanent schedule. Then lunch, usually grilled cheese mmmmm grilled cheese. After lunch I go to work out, anything from lifting weights to some form of cardio.

Then it is shower and get ready for counseling appointments in the afternoon. In an organization this size you can bet there will be somebody with issues on any given day. Hasn't disappointed me yet. Then I plan to do some work on Sunday's sermon and plan out some programs for the guys. I am planning some bible Studies that still need work to get going and these guys are super anxious to get a bible study going. Wow. I am also working on petitioning different agencies for bible study materials. If you know of anyone who could help us out that would be awesome shoot me an email. I am thinking of doing "every man's battle"

Next it is time to call home. I like to call at about the same time so I know she will be home. After all this I find someone to go to evening chow with me. I spend the evening talking with people and finally end up in front of a computer screen talking to ya'll.

I will probably do a "What do I do?" update when things change around some. Hopefully I will be able to include some of the fun activities next one.

Later

Hope is on the way

2006-04-15T22:43:00.000-05:00

Day 8. Happy Easter. They killed Jesus on Friday. He predicted it would happen. He told his disciples he would be back from the grave. Still they were sad and scared. Everything they believed about this man Jesus seemed to be just a dream that had just been taken away. Sunday came and not only restored their hopes, but it surpassed their wildest dreams. Jesus rose from the dead that Sunday and by doing so defeated death and brought hope to all men. Easter represents all of what was won on the cross, it represents Satan's ultimate defeat. "There is a deeper magic." You may be at a Friday night in your life, you may have lost all your hopes and dreams for the future. Be patient Sunday is on its way. (just quick sum up of today's sermon.)

I got my room today, it is so nice to have a semi-permanent place to stay. I can finally unpack and buy those little things I have been waiting to get like bed sheets. You get really picky about what you have when you have to carry it all around. I went to the local Iraqi bazaar today to see if I could find anything for my room. I tried to buy a bed blanket but we couldn't agree on a price. You wouldn't believe how difficult it is to find regular old sheets in this place. I think next time I will look for some rugs or something for the floor.

Today I also got a visit from my Brigade chaplain, Chaplain Wendt. It was nice to see him, he is so encouraging. We had a long talk and then went to dinner. He says that this place is much nicer than the place where he is staying. I will have to go visit him sometime and compare for myself.

Life goes on

2006-04-13T08:46:00.000-05:00

Day 5
I finally have a computer that I can use on the internet. It is nice to have the security of something familiar like my own computer. I have been on the move for over a month now and each little thing that tells me something familiar is a welcome relief. I am in a temporary office right now, but even this is an improvement.

The last week I have been getting an orientation from the chaplain I am replacing. He tells me that I am his favorite person right now. He is a pretty neat guy, gave a lot of good info for my mission here. I also got a good tour of the base with special emphasis on all the good spots.

I have been thinking lately how to explain to someone who isn't here what it is like to be here. I remember when I was about 16, I went to bible camp and stayed in a tent with a paraplegic guy from our church. I asked him what it was like to be paralyzed. He told me that one day in rehab some doctors came in and rode around in wheelchairs for a week. They did all the things that he had to deal with everyday. They were trying to understand what it was like by experiencing it for themselves. He told me that there was one big difference between their experience and his. At the end of the week, those doctors got up from their chairs and went home.

Being here is hardest because we are away from family, but that is not the worst part. The worst part is that life still goes on. I know that everyday things are happening to my family that I will never see. There will be birthdays and holidays, cut fingers and rug stains, trips to church and family visits, thousands of memories that happen everyday. Here it seems like time stands still. Nothing changes and everyday seems the same as the last.

Please don't take my ramblings as complaining, just letting you in on what is going through my mind. Mostly I am just glad to have this computer and finally have a place to unpack. Praise the Lord for small miracles.

All is nigh well

2006-04-12T06:35:00.000-05:00

Day 4. I am in another process if getting settled into a new place. Sometimes it seems like I do more moving around than I do staying around. My accomodations are rather nice so far the best I have had since mobilization. I am getting my bearings with a new map and new locations for everything.

It will be awhile before I know where everthing is located. It is somewhat like moving to a new town with nice neighbors and unfriendly people in the next town. I realize that it is only day 4, but the enemy seems like more of an inconvenience than any real threat. I am sure my opinion will waver over the next year.
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Other than the occasional inconvinience I really enjoy this job. The ministry is great and it is really all I have to do all day. Imagine being paid to do ministry all day. It is like some wierd dream come true. The only thing that could make this job better is going home to my family at night.

Anne, Connor I miss you guys so much. Everyone else I miss you too, I just spend more time thinking of them. Thanks for reading and be prepared for more regular posts.

This week being holy week I am busy preparing for Good Friday Service and Easter Service. I am excited about both. I have my own chapel and I am prepared to use it;) For Good Friday I have been thinking about what it must have been like for Jesus' disciples. What must they have been thinking; after Jesus' last words "My God why have you forsaken me." What a dark and horrible day. I'm not planning a cheerful service for Friday.

Fight fair? Never.

2006-03-30T16:24:00.000-06:00

The more I think about it the angrier I get. It is 0130 in the morning here and I can't get to sleep because I am angry. It is not that I really need to sleep at the moment, I would rather just sit here and tell all of you just what I think of my arch enemy. That low down snake cannot go down soon enough for me.

When I signed up to go to this place I realized from the beginning I was in for a fight. The place we have been sent to is spiritually dark and the gospel has had minimal impact for generations. Satan has a strong grip on this place and I am sure he likes it that way.

As chaplains we come to bring God to the soldiers wherever they go. Truthfully I expected a fight; spiritually speaking that is. I expected Satan to attack me and the other chaplains with me. I have been praying faithfully against this attack and I guess I have grown somewhat complacent on my praying for this.

When I think of how we would be attacked I expected that we would be tempted to do all kinds of crazy things. To fear the enemy, to fight among each other, or even to act immorally and lose credibility. I did not expect him to attack out families. I don't know why it seems like such an easy target now that I think about just what that kind of attack does.

I am angry that our families are not safe from spiritual attack, but even more so I am angry at myself for not recognizing the vulnerability. It is a tough battle and we need to be ready to defend all that is dear to us. We had better prepare our families. The fight is coming to them in a way that is not fair, but very real.

I would ask that all of you who read this and believe that God is stronger than any enemy we face, to pray for us. Pray for our families. Keep in touch with them and let them know that you are praying for them. Keep them in close contact and encourage them whenever and wherever you can.

Thank you,
Todd Luken

Sunday's team

2006-03-26T00:04:00.000-06:00

Sunday always seems like a milestone to me. It is not the only day that I do services, but it is somehow special to me. I guess it is because there is some expectation from me on Sunday. Every other day of the week I set my own schedule and everything I do us up to me as to when and where. But Sunday that day everyone expects to worship. I think it is a better worship than on Wednesdays, why I don't really know. Maybe it is because there is some anticipation for Sunday, or maybe it is becuause I treat it more special.

In the military world you do worship services whenever we get the time. We work every day, sometimes all day. Every day is as important as the next. As chaplains we have a saying, "everyday is Sunday." But Sunday "actual" is special because it is not "whenever we get the time," rather it is time set aside. The fact that it is time set aside makes it special.

It is like a tithe of our time. Of all the time the Lord has given us, we set aside 1/7th of it for him. I like that, it is not the day that is important rather it is the setting aside that is important. Sunday could be anyday, but here it is important because that is the day that we set specifically to worship him.

Been thinking of the everything belongs to God thing lately, so it is no wonder that my musings on Sunday center around this theme. Read some about Jacob in Genesis. In chapter 33 he has a drastic 24 hours. He goes from everything I have earned to everything comes from God. An interesting change.

Everyone here says to me things like, "Hey don't mess with the chaplain he has God on his team." So I will be playing cards or Halo or something and inevitably someone will bust out with this phrase. I think that Jacob must have thought the same way, hey don't mess with me I have God on my team.

I think they have it backward. God is not on my team, I am on his team. Maybe I should correct the phrase to say, "Hey don't mess with the chaplain he is on God's team."

23 hours, 6 movies and 7 meals

2006-03-25T05:47:00.000-06:00

Anticipation was high as we were about to leave. Everyone was excited and anxious about what it would be like "over there." Up until now the longest flight I have been on was the flight I took in the early 90's to England. On that flight we watched a movie and we were afforded the luxury of having 2 meals on the plane, well this flight was a little longer. 6 movies and 7 meals 8).

I don't have much to say about our flight except that it was long and also that foreign airports are very different. The smoking section for one was a tad different. There was not a smoking section per se, there was a non-smoking section. The rest of the airport was free game for smokers. And, the gift shops were a little odd as well; lets put it this way, In a PG forum I cannot tell you what all was in those gift shops, but some of it was pretty funny.

It also felt so strange to have everyone so greatful for out service. I guess it is something I never really will get used to but, we got so many thank you's and such that I literally cannot recount them all. I am glad that people are so greatful and it makes me wonder just what they are thinking about when they express themselves. Are they thinking of their family growing up in a safer world, or are they just glad that it is not them? Just something that makes me wonder.

It is hard to wrap my head around the fact that I am so far from home. 23 hours on a plane and I am literally almost half way around the world. I have been far from home before, but this is so different from anything I have ever experienced. I am certian I will find my way here and I pray that God will direct my paths in the way he would want me to take His ministry.

I have been meditating upon my own mission here and I have come up with a way to express what I am thinking. It comes out of fear of failure maybe, or just a sudden realization of our situation. Here goes; It saddens me to know that soldiers come over here and purchase freedom for the Iraqi people with their blood, and yet die in their sins. It is my mission to ensure that every soldier I come in contact with has some concept of eternity. Some clue about what is in store for them in the next life, before the leave this one.

It looks like for the next little while I will have better computer access so I will be posting more often. "En Shallah" Lord willing

Chaplain Luken

Holiday

2006-03-15T23:29:00.000-06:00

I had it all planned out. You ever look forward to something so much that you play it out in your head and sometimes even on paper. I was going to get a 4 day pass. 4 days to see my wife and my son. We decided to meet in Mobile, AL. She flew there, and I drove there to meet her, it is only about an hour and a half from here so not such a long trip.

I was thinking of all the things that you would imagine we would do together. Walks on the beach, nice quiet dinners, some quality alone time... You get the picture. My wife and I have been married for 11 1/2 years now, all of that time it has been just us. Just us in a small, small, small apartment near the St. Paul campus, just us in a nice place near the Minneapolis campus, just us together in Philadelphia. We have learned to rely upon one another for companionship and we also "own" each other's time. There is a certain expectation there that we have for each other, and expectation that we will take the time for each other.

So this 4 day pass would be no different, we got the time and we would be together so let loose the together time. Oh I forgot to mention one thing; had a baby 3 months ago. Babies take a lot of time, and they don't seem to care if it is not their turn for attention. Even if you were just paying attention to him, if he wants your attention he will make sure he gets it.

So our walks on the beach included some feeding and diaper changing, our quiet dinners well they were a little shorter than they usually are, and our quality alone time well lets just say we were never really alone. I must admit that even though I was so glad to see Anne and Connor, I began to resent him just a little. I remembered when I used to be the center of my wife's attention and I liked it that way.

The Lord has interesting ways to show us just how selfish we really are. I remember when I first got married I woke up one morning and saw my beautiful bride, my first thought was "boy am I lucky to have such a great wife," my second thought was "Hey! Hey that's my shirt I was going to wear that today." My selfish heart has now turned on my son and the object we are fighting for is his mother. When we got to the hotel and I saw my little boy my first thought was, "wow the Lord has really blessed me, he has given me this awesome little boy to look after," my second thought was, "Ok little guy go to sleep and let me have some time here with MY bride."

The boy wakes up every few hours, I do not know why parents ever have more than one child. It seriously is like a hardcore form of torture. I am grateful that my wife is there to take care of him and I do feel bad that I have left here all alone to deal with the parenting for this first year. I think she wants to have more just so I can experience the joy of parenting first hand.

I really enjoyed my pass, and I wouldn't trade the time for anything. The boy is trouble on a stick, but I miss him already. He was a constant pain in the @$$, but man what I wouldn't give to have him here right now. My wife, I don't know how she does it. She has a lot on her plate and yet she is able to function. I love you honey thanks for coming to see me. I miss them both, they are what makes 12 months seem like a lifetime.

As much as I like to believe that the Lord has squeezed all the selfish juice out of me, it seems like there is always more that will come out. It would appear as if I still have much more to learn about selflessness.

In between

2006-02-27T22:30:00.000-06:00

In between, its a wierd place to be. Right now we are in between; in between training and deployment, in between work and rest and in between almost ready to go and not yet ready. It is a tough place to be this in between place.

The problem is that you are not really sure what to do when you are in between. Just a few days ago my day was cramm packed with things to do, I did not think that I would ever get it all done. In fact the op tempo was furious that I missed doing services last week to go along on a mission that included almost the whole squadron. It was good training and I am glad I went, but wish I could have held worship.

So now we live in between. We have the details to clean up. The little onsie-twosie things that 4000 different people can miss out on during a big operation like this. For instance, I missed out on the new uniform draw because I went to see Connor be born. Now multiply by 4000 and it can get a bit tedious cleaning up all the small things that were missed.

It makes me think about how as christians we live in between. We live in between Christ's first and second coming. We live in a time where we can see God's plan in action in the person of Christ, but we can only imagine the ending. In a time and place where Christ has saved us from all our sin, but we still struggle with sin everyday. Christ has already won the victouy, his death and resurrection have conqured sin and death. His reward is us and we live in that victory.

But, we also live now, here in a time before the second coming. Where people still get sick, hurt and die. where people go hungry and cold. Where even the greatest of us humans struggles with their sin. Where christians still backstab one another.

We live here in the in between, between glory and pain. Between perfection and wreched sinfulness. We are in the place where we already have victory over sin, but we do not yet have victory over the flesh. Life in the in between, it is just painful.

Perspectives on the Promised Land

2006-02-22T20:21:00.000-06:00

Well we just returned to the beautiful, awesome, home away from home Camp Shelby. It is funny what a little perspective will do for you. 4 weeks ago my fellow soldiers and I couldn't wait to get away from Camp Shelby and go somewhere, anywhere else. We were so tired of the "Mississippi hospitality" we were receiving. Just wanted to leave here if you get the picture.
We arrived in Ft. Polk roughly 3 weeks ago and well lets just say it was not what we expected. The accommodations were horrible, the food was worse, and the weather... Well lets just say Minnesota is not the only place on earth with unpredictable weather. It was either rainy and muddy or cold and colder. Not like Minnesota cold, but colder that you'd expect it to be in the south. I mean Pennsylvania winters were warmer. Hmmm south? I think Katrina took the warm weather away.
It wasn't just that it was the whole super fast optempo(that's a military term for "got a lot of stuff to do with no time to do it" Sigh...For the 5 day a week, 7-1630 work schedule.) But, it was also the whole being evaluated thing. It was like a 3 week long test. Even though my proctors were great it was still a test. Actually I think that the best part of the whole experience was the Chaplains and Chaplain assistant at Ft. Polk. I really appreciated all of them. Mostly it was a test of the work that I did this summer, the preparation I did for the deployment teams.
I did a limited survey and most of the other soldiers felt the same way as I did, Please send me back to Camp Shelby. I am starting to think that all of this training is just something that makes us anxious and happy to be in Iraq. The biggest part for me is that it is hard to be "unsettled." Unsettled to me is the feeling that you can't get too comfortable in any one spot because you need to move again soon. I am starting to get used to that feeling. The nice thing about it is that it is impossible to get complacent.
I have been thinking a lot lately about Abram/Abraham. Abram was given a promise, the promise of a child that will be his heir. He has wealth, God has blessed him greatly, but he is missing 2 things. He is missing an heir and a home. Why is it a big deal to him? Well because Abram is thinking more eternally than temporally, he recognizes that when he dies all his wealth will mean nothing without someone to leave it to. But, this promise is bigger than just someone to inherit Abram's wealth. The promise is that he will become the father of a nation. But that promise is even bigger than that, it is through him that God will save his people. It is through this promise that we are provided with a savior.
Once God reassures Abram of the promise, he is settled. Once he is sure of an heir he is less unsettled. God then promises him that he will inherit the land of Canaan. Notice that the inheritance means nothing without the heir. We have also been promised an inheritance. We have been given the promise of heaven. Heaven is our promised land, however, it means nothing without the heir. Without Jesus Heaven is more than out of reach, it is meaningless.
There seems to be some parallel here. God promises Abram an heir and an inheritance. I believe that as a part of that same promise God promises you Jesus and Heaven. God has already given us Jesus, and if we have him, if we have the heir, we have Heaven, we have the inheritance.

Pause EX

2006-02-13T09:14:00.000-06:00

We are currently at a pause in the JRTC exercise. Which means I can steal a few moments to make another post. I have really missed posting on this thing. It is somewhat cathartic for me, and I know that my family and my friends are able to hear what I am up to so I guess that is why. The training here is great, the accommodations not so much.

I am developing a negative attitude toward the work ethic of the civilians who support us. I am not so sure if that follows through to civilian life in general, mostly because I am starting to forget what it was like on the outside. When I complain about the civilian work ethic mind you I am complaining about myself in some way.

They only seem interested in doing the bare minimum to "accomplish" their mission and I use that word accomplish lightly. When their quitting hour hits, they are gone even if they are not finished with the work they have to do. It is the whole 9-5 mentality that I think I am losing.
It does seem like sometimes that all the days run together for me. The saying around here is that everyday is groundhog day. (BTW happy belated groundhog day Ron) Everyday and every hour of the day seems to run together in one long work day. There is no such thing as weekend. Freetime and sleep time and shower time and laundry time and shopping time and break time are all the same thing. You take it when you can get it and you are thankful for each moment.

So back to the pause ex. Today we have some small amount of free time, but it is really not exactly free-time it is an opportunity to breathe and catch up on the things we skipped because of the urgent things we have to do. You know one interesting thing that has happened here, I have so many fires to put out every day that I barely have time to think and prepare my sermon before it is Sunday. But, I have not missed a devotion time or a prayer time since I got here.

It is strange to me that with so many urgent things to do everyday that I am able to maintain my devotional life. Maybe it is because it has become a necessity now more than ever. One OC (observer controller) here told me, "you gotta stay filled up." It is so true. If I didn't fill up every day I would be empty by tomorrow. It is a good exercise the filling and the emptying.

I am beginning to think that what most Christians need is not to be told that they have to do devotions every day, they need a reason to empty themselves out. Because once you start getting empty you really feel it and you compulsively fill up again. I think part of the reason that so many Christians have a hard time with devotions is because they never do anything with what they have been given, they never empty. Maybe my job should be more of freeing people to use what they have been given.

Anyway, I was doing worship yesterday. In the morning service we had some trouble in the beginning. My chapel, the DFAC (dining facility), had been taken over with detainees from the game we are playing here. So I had to move my service. We moved across the compound to the area where the CSH (combat support hospital) resides. The CSH personnel are from Puerto Rico.

They came to service with a guitar and wanted to worship. Wanted to worship not just in English, but in Spanish. It was awesome. We really had a great time worshiping in Spanish and in English. I loved hearing the songs and some of them I remembered from my church in Philadelphia.

In Philly we used to have Spanish songs every week. Sometimes more so than English songs. My pastor there would tell me that it is important for native speakers to hear their native language. I thought about it and it made a lot of sense to me. I mean if I was stuck in France or someplace like that I would be anxious to hear English any English. It doesn't really matter how beautiful the foreign language was, it wouldn't be my native language.

It got me thinking. I have been thinking about how scripture tells us that we are aliens and strangers to this world. This world is not our home, but we have a place prepared for us by Jesus. And, I wonder what is our native language if we are not of this world. If I belong somewhere else and this world is not really my home, what is the language of my home.
I think it is worship. I love to hear the songs and the word. I think it may be the language of my real home. I speak this alien language now, but someday I will speak only the worship. The language of my home.

Well I may not be back for another 2 weeks or so. Thanks for visiting. Dont forget to stop and say hi, I like to know that you have visited. Hopefully I will be able to post again at the next pause ex.

Safety day

2006-01-28T11:07:00.000-06:00

Yesterday was safety stand down day. I realize that this sounds important, but it turned out to be yet another snore fest. Maybe I was just surly because I gave up a trip to the mall to go to safety day. I actually had the option to go to either one this time, but SPC Cowell wanted to go to safety day. (eyes rolling) I will admit that it was a good idea, safety day that is, it just turned out to be another program that was done half heartedly.

We started early. All of HHT (headquarters headquarters troop) was gathered at the TOC (tactical operations center.) Most everyone was milling about saying the obligatory good mornings. Safety day started with a powerpoint(I am beginning to believe that power point was invented by the devil himself) presentation on environmental injuries and environmental things we need to know at JRTC (joint readiness training center.) The big thing I took away is separate your trash at JRTC. WOW I realize that the Army can be picky but these guys are seriously ridiculous.

Next we moved on to the "critters of Iraq." Did you know that they have 7 different types of deadly snakes and 4 different types of deadly scorpions and no antivenom anywhere closer than Iran. What is the deal? Is antivenom that difficult to obtain that after 3 years there we still can't put our hands on any. I guess it is just economical, not that many people actually get bit or stung by venomous things here. Key point for me stay away from the critters. I actually know a guy whose hobby in the US is catching venomous snakes, and when he went to Iraq he continued his hobby. Now I am not one who is terrified of snakes, but I do have a healthy respect for them. I guess another crazy pastime in Iraq is to catch scorpions and camel spiders and have insect wars. The scorpion wins 99% of the time so I hear. Sounds interesting but no thank you.

After being freaked out a little more we moved on to vehicle safety. There we went over things we already know like where to safely place the jack, and what to do in case of a roll over, wear your seat belt, yadda yadda yadda. At this point I thankfully got a phone call for a real world mission. Not that I was happy to deliver bad news, but I feel some sense of purpose when I am doing something that only I can do. What is strange is that the news no matter what it is, does not help much with knowing how to predict how the encounter will go over with the soldier.

The Army system is just that a system. It is cold and blind. It does not care if you have a family, and it does not care if you have other commitments. That may be the hardest part of this job. If anything ever happened to my grandmother or my aunts, uncles, nieces or nephews I couldn't come home. Don't take this wrong I am not airing my complaints, I am just attempting to spell out for you the situation that some of these soldiers are faced with. I know that if something were to happen to my nephew Damon for instance, it would devastate me to not be able to come back home to be with my family at that time.

There does seem to be some purpose for this system. The army like a family with tons of brothers and sisters. If one sibling gets something, I guarantee you that everyone will want the same thing. The purpose of having a standard regulation then is to help accomplish our mission. It will amaze you how dependent the army is upon ordinary people. At times it seems like the army is just a big machine, but the moving parts of that machine are people. If too many parts go missing the machine just doesn't work, and the job doesn't get done.

I say all this to say that I understand why, why the regulation only allows you to go home for certian emergencies for immediate family only. (father, mother, brother, sister, wife, children, to include step and in-law, but it still sucks. And it is impossible to explain why it is like that to someone who just wants to be there for their family. I guess that is part of the reason the Army has me here, to help cover that gap. That being said hopefully you all will more fully understand the sacrifice paid by these great Americans I am privilidged to serve with.

Jesus be my strength and my shield. Help me serve both those who know you and those who do not. For those soldiers who do know you help me to remind them to take some comfort in the knowledge that those who love Jesus will be reunited. Also that this place is only a shadow of the eternal, and that those who have died in Christ now live in the light having escaped the shadow. For those soldiers who do not know you send your Holy Spirit to light the way to a relationship with you. Let me be your voice to a generation crying out for you. Though they deny you with their lips their hearts know you and long for you. Lord help me to bring understanding, and prepare me to help these soldiers carry their pain. Amen

Well we leave for JRTC tomorrow so I may be physically unable to post for awhile. Please check back from time to time.

The waiting

2006-01-24T13:34:00.000-06:00

I heard a quote from somewhere that war is like: "Extensive periods of boredom intersperced with brief moments of sheer terror." Army life is much like that. Today we wait... and tomorrow we wait... and probably the next day we will wait as well. Then the day after that there will not be enough time in the day. And, that will go on for the next few days like that. There will be so much to do that I will be pulling my hair out, and then I will be back to waiting. If only there was a way to do some prep for the busy time.

I have been thinking today that the waiting may actually be a blessing. It gives me time to talk to my soldiers. Almost forces me to do so. It is at these times, the waiting, we both have time to talk. It is interesting what you will hear from people when they have time to say anything. When the business is taken out of the language and all there is left, is whatever is inside. Business is easy, inside is not so easy.

Usually it starts out with dumb jokes. I like dumb jokes and I think everyone else does as well, if they didn't no would bother to remember them. Then sometimes, sometimes they just come out with statements that I wonder about. Statements like; "I used to be a catholic-lutheran-etc...," or "I don't believe in orgainized religion," or even really good ones like, "chaplain how do you know the bible is true."

Honest I am not making this up. Sometimes this job is just too easy. Soldiers want to know about God. They have a genuine respect at least for my position, which lends itself to a respect for God at least around me. (And in case you are wondering I don't think I got this last part backward. Respect for officers is easy to find here, respect for God not as easy) In the civillian world people are afforded a luxury, that luxury is not believing in something. Here soldiers are looking for something to believe in, they are looking for a grand purpose in this whole war thing. One soldier asked me last week, "...are we fighting evil forces in Iraq?" I told him that officially our government takes the neutral side on the whole good vs evil thing.

His question really got me to thinking. Is this war really a good vs evil fight? From a christian standpoint I believe that it is just that. I know I am walking out on a plank here. My position doesn't really afford me the luxury of a bias. But, if I have learned nothing else from my friend Joel(treading lightly is not his strong suit; if you dont believe me visit his blog), we can't sit here and believe that we are not there for a purpose. A purpose that is good. If we believed that we were there for evil purposes I think my office would be full every day. That being said these guys are still looking for a grand purpose in their involvement in this war. We seem to have the support of the American people, it makes me proud to serve when I see all the support out there. In this there is some purpose, to keep the fighting away from us, to keep the war out of our back yards. To enforce peace so hopefully my son will not be sitting at a keyboard typing notes to his wife and hoping for packages in the mail.

That is great but there needs to be something more. It is strange to be so close to history as to be able to touch it. I read stories about what my grandfather did in WWII and I am in awe. The dedication, the sacrifice, the very shaping of history at his fingertips. It is a great story, my grandmother told me the story when I was 12 and more than 25 years later I can still remember the details. They were not just fighting a war, they were conquering evil. An evil regime at its worst, you will be hard pressed to find someone to disagree with me on this point.

So I ask are we fighting that same evil today? Is terrorism the new face of evil risen from the mold of Hitler and Stalin? Who is this enemy we are fighting? Is it just a culture difference or is it Religious extremeists? That is the answer that everyone always tells me. If so it seems wierd to me that an areligious army is fighting a religious one. A lot of the guys I talk to do not want to hurt anyone, but they are protectors first and foremost. They will kill to protect those they believe to be innocents.

I used to think the guys in the movie Blackhawk down were right. "It's about the guy next to you." It is about taking care of each other, when the bullets start flying we are there to cover each other's back. That sounds great for hollywood, but it doesn't make up much of a purpose. I hate to go out on another limb and contradict a popular book and movie, but purpose has to have much more in it than covering your buddy.

It is about the protector. Why does the sheep dog protect the sheep from the wolves? It is more than just training. The sheep dog does it because it cares about the sheep, and I believe that it also knows that the sheep cannot protect themselves from the wolves. The sheep dog is there because he knows that the wolf is there.

We are here because the wolf is out there.

SPC Cowell

2006-01-22T16:48:00.000-06:00

To everyone who doesn't know him, I would like to introduce my assistant SPC Cowell. He serves as sort of a combination of head usher/ bodyguard. He helps me with my religious services and some of my soldier counseling. He also takes care of our equipment and keeps me in touch with what is going on with our base line troopers. I have allowed him permission to post on here so you just might hear something from him from time to time.

Anyway together we make the Unit ministry Team. That just sounds cool doesn't it? We are learning some stuff together like a couple of weeks ago we went to Combat Lifesaver class together. We learned how to do some basic medical lifesaving treatments. It was kinda funny seeing as I spent my first 16 years, wow did I just say 16 years!, as a combat medical NCO. I tried to explain to them that I already knew this stuff, but in the end my answer was, "check the box hooah!" Just do it and get it over with even though you already know exactly what the training entails. In fact in a past military life I used to teach the class. The information in the class was nothing new but it was still fun to go and practice up on old skills. And it is nice to know that my assistant knows those skills as well.

Just a little sample of the fun, fun, fun training we are getting here. A few weeks before that we went to Combatives class. This was an interesting hand to hand training class. Now back when I joined the Army back in 19..*cough* aitteysiks. We had hand to hand combat training using our weapon as a club, "BUTT STROKE TO THE HEAD!!!!"

Now this new training we had was nothing like that old training at all. It was actually very physical and very cool. We learned how to handle ourselves in close quarters combat with various weapons and in various situations. At one point it got somewhat redicilous how many things he was using as a weapon. It was more like a martial arts training event than anything else. We learned stuff like the Judo flip with body armor on, very cool. If I remember correctly I landed on my back hard a few more times than I would have liked to. Which in turn caused my head to feels a little spinny, but I was glad to have the training--oh and if Cowell had poked me in the throat one more time -grrrrrrr :) end of the day we both learned quite a bit about how important close quarters combat can be. It really is a forgotten art.

Now I do not want to give the impression that all of our training is fun and interesting, for the most part it fulfills just the opposite mission. This is where we get mileage from our motto, "check the box hooah!" We have had hours upon literally hours of boooooooooooaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggg power point training. If I were to design hell it wouldn't include as much burning lakes as it did endless pointless powerpoint slides. I am not sure why we have to do this, but I have taken the stance that asking that question will only lead to insanity.

We are also getting some training as a ministry team. Every, well almost every, Monday and Thursday we go and learn ministry specific stuff. This for the most part is training that I have already have, but I relish the time I get to spend with other chaplains and chaplain assistants. This morning we did a chaplain AAR(after action review) on the FTX(field training exercise) we just had the last 2 weeks. Usually those sessions turn into a pat yourself on the back session, but this one was..... No different. Ha almost has ya there. Not to be too critical of everything, but I have been to too many of these things and I am a little jaded I think. Although it was nice to hear my Brigade Chaplain say that I was always in the right place at the right time. I am not sure if that was true or not, but hey I got my pat on the back.

What I did learn on the most recent FTX was the memorial service. We had a few SIMULATED casualties and I did their memorial service. It was difficult for everyone involved. There were even some higher ranking individuals who refused to participate. I guess they thought it would be too difficult for them. On the ones we did have it was very moving and realistic training. At the first on you could really feel the tension in the air and it really felt for all those involved that we had in fact lost a soldier. It is a hard slap of reality when you do something like that, but I am convinced it is very important training.

Writing this blog is a learning process for me so I am not sure if it will always include inspirational chaplain stuff. I think it will from time to time but for now it will be just what I am doing on a day to day thing. I feel some compulsion to write something spiritual seeing as yesterday was Sunday and all. But instead of going to church yesterday I went out and took some time off with some fellow soldiers. It was great. Not much just some wings and conversation, some laughs and stories. I do believe that it was sorely needed.

I am learning that there is more to spiritual fitness than bible study. More to being spiritually well rounded than spending your evenings in prayer. I am learning that to be spiritually fit you need a certain level of emotional and physical fitness. Well maybe you don't "need" it but it sure helps. So I say with some level of confidence that I was working on my spiritual fitness last night at BW3s eating wings and watching the Seahawks annihilate the Panthers.

CH Luken

The beginning

2006-01-22T02:20:00.000-06:00

I see so many people making these blogs that I thought I would try my hand at it. If nothing else it will serve as a good journal for me to remember my experiences. I know that there are many soldiers telling their story on blogspots. In fact one of my good chaplain friends has his own. I am not usually very good at writing consistently, hopefully this will help me to have some motivation to keep writing. I would really like to remember all of the things I am and will be up to over the next year or so.

Sorry, we haven't been properly introduced. My name is Chaplain Todd Luken. I serve in the Army as... You guessed it a chaplain. I am in the process of being deployed and I will be serving as Squadron Chaplain for some 600 soldiers for about a year.

I have been in train-up mode for about 2 months now. It is a long and tedious trial and error type of learning. There are several things that have to be accomplished during this time.
Mandatory "training" we like to call it "checking the box" in reality is going over the soldier skills we already know, but we have to prove to the army that we do in fact know it. I have two categories of mandatory training; Soldier skills and chaplain skills. Neither of them are very exciting, mostly because it is so repetitive.

Then there is the working together part the unit I am a part of is made of several different parts from many different states. This can sometimes prove difficult especially when higher leadership refuses to work together. All in all they seem to work together well. My job for this part is simply to get to know everyone. That can take awhile when we are talking literally hundreds of people. You have to be somewhat creative to even meet some people. I have done everything from visiting them during morning calisthenics, to pulling night guard duty with the Joes. This part of the training is the most rewarding for me, mostly because it requires a great deal of creativity. I think it is also the most demanding part of my job, but I know it will be the most important. If anyone here is going to trust me they first have to know who I am. Noone would want to come to someone with a problem if they had never met them before. So I trudge on trying different things to get to know people.

Today I tried a Squadron level party. It didn't go so well. Well I shouldn't say that so much, the people who came enjoyed it enough, it is just that not so many people came. Ah well, back to the drawing board as they say. Hey that would be a good idea...A drawing board. hmmmm. Anyway, I enjoy this part of my job, but I think it is the hardest for me. I am good at making friends, but I am not all that extroverted so I push myself.

I am getting kind of tired so I will leave it off here for now.

CH Luken